Monday, June 25, 2001

Okay, disregard the previous melancholy self-defeated post dated 6/20/01. Everything worked out perfectly and we are on our way. I spent a quiet weekend with Renee, and I felt so energized when I woke up to head to work today. Everything is going well at this point I have just a few weeks before I get married. I have been waiting for this day my entire life. Many people think of a wedding being a woman's day, and to a certain extent it is. It is a day when a woman feels the most beautiful, regal, sophisticated, and enchanting. I suppose that is because of all of the traditional pomp and circumstance that everyone likes to be a part of. But, though I want to bask in the revelry of the day, of the hour, of the moment. I am looking at my life taking a new course. Renee will be the woman that I will share everything with, have children with, laugh with, cry with, get old with, and die with. While the concept it is fascinating and somewhat storybook, it is scary. Not scary in the sense that my life, my productivity, or my potential is limited by this union. Not in the least. But rather, it is scary when I think of the enormity of the situation, and the depth of the responsibility that I am taking on. Not just being a husband, but alson being a Father of two. Wow, I have always wanted to be in this situation, and I wouldn't change a thing about how things have gone to date. The terrible events that befell me in earlier days didn't seem to make much sense, and I was always asking myself and God why things were the way they were. But, I see that all of the trials and tribulations were merely preparation so that I my truly recognize and acknowledge the tremendous gift that God has bestowed upon me.

Wednesday, June 20, 2001

Things have been going spectacularly well as of late, but yet there is another hangup. I am not going to lose faith, but I am going to keep looking up to the sky. I am going to keep praying on this one and hopefully things will turn out.......things may not come easy, but things will come.

Tuesday, June 05, 2001

Well it has been a long time since I wrote anything in this weblog....I attempted to about 3 weeks ago, and actually I wrote a lot, but the server crashed and I was not about to write that much again. Well, things are going amazingly well for me here in lil ole Kentucky. My lady and I are getting married in less than 2 months, she got a new job and a pay raise, the boys are doing well, its summer time, and we have been getting along superbly. How could things get any better? I got a NEW JOB! I was picked to work in the Governor's Office of Technology as a Resource Management Analyst II. What exactly a Resource Management Analyst II does in comparison to a Resource Management Analyst I I don't know.....hell....I don't even know what I am going to be doing. All I know is that I will be making sure that a software program runs smoothly that handles accounts payable and receivable, and keeps up with comp time. I am a little nervous as I have no formal computer training, but I do have a fascination with computers, software, and technology that is boundless. When I got word of the job I was ready for salary arbitration and what not, but it did not go as I expected it to. I came up with a figure that was approximately 10% more than what I make now. The guy dismissed that figure and gave me the number that he was GOING to pay me....about 22% more than what I make now. I tried to maintain the poker face, but I know my expression looked just like "Shaggy" off of Scooby Doo when he says, "ZOIKS!" So, all is well. My family is doing well, Carolyn just got back from Germany yesterday, Neekie is doing fine like she always does, and I can't complain about much of anything. Oh damn....how could I forget...Robbie is calling me "Daddy" now. Isn't that the coolest/scariest thing that you have ever heard? I was more than flattered...it met with a little hesitation on the part of his biological, but all of that is straightened out now. I am so happy, yet I am concerned about how I carry myself around him and his brother. I remember being the little guy that wanted to emulate everything that I saw "Daddy" doing. I just want to be a positive role model.....well, 2 months and I will be a married man....I cannot wait.