Friday, August 29, 2003

Is it ever enough?

We often ask ourselves and others the question. "Is it ever enough?" This is very poignant. Do we ever do enough? Do we ever do enough for others? Are our expectations ever met? Do we meet others expectations? I suppose it is all relative, both in situation and in perspective. I wonder will it ever be enough, I wonder that on a daily basis. Will my expectations ever be met? Are they too high? Are the demands that I place upon those that are close to me too much? Perhaps, but hell....who knows? Do I do my part? Of course everyone always feels as if they do their part, but really? Aren't self-evaluations the most deluded and skewed?

Over the past few weeks, a number of things have happened that are of some merit. I was commissioned as an Officer in the United States Army National Guard. My daughter turned a year old. I started back working on my Master's degree. I started working on a Management Trainee Program, and there may be a new job prospect on the horizon. Ordinarily, I would be ready to drool on myself with glee, but I still wonder, "Is this going to be enough?" I wonder about happiness, and I wonder if I am happy enough. I wonder about my family's happiness, and I wonder if they are happy enough. *sigh* I suppose I need to change that Imode link that boasts of my unhappiness for the last 4 months. I actually haven't been quite that melancholy, but I have been quite lazy.

All in all, I suppose that this is life, and this is the way that it was supposed to be lived. But I had hoped for so much more for myself. And, believe it or not, this hope was not for myself, but for what I would be able to offer. But, unfortunately what I have to offer never seems to be enough....at least for me. And it is hard to see beyond that.

Wednesday, August 20, 2003

The evolution of trash talking...

I always wondered why people talk trash so much in regard to sports. Warren Sapp appears to be the undisputed king of trash talking. He has often been seen standing over his victims spewing taunts about what horrific damage he has done to them after he hits them. I always thought that this was perhaps the machismo of high paid professional athletes, and the lax standards of sportsmanship that the NFL allows. But, while helping coach Devons JV youth football league team I see that the trash talk starts much earlier. In fact, you needn't be a superstar who always performs, you only need to do one good thing at any given time to talk trash. You could be the kind of receiver who ordinarily couldn't catch a cold, but if you happen to catch a pass and get by the corner back then you have license to talk trash. Here are some of the things that I have heard uttered on the field by nine and ten year olds.

Runningack: I shook you like a wet puppy!

Quarterback: Get up off me, rookie!

One player: (out loud to nobody in particular) Why can't I run this route correctly?
trash talker: Because you're a fag.

After one player fumbled three consecutive handoffs during drill the head coach made the offense run. When they were returning to the huddle one child whispered to the offending player: We have to run because you suck....I can't stand you, you old punk ass muthafucka!

While one of the tailbacks watched a lineman running a 100 yard sprint he turned to his buddy and said, "You don't need a stopwatch for him, you need a calendar."

One Player: My mom tackles harder than you.
Trash Talker: Big deal, your mom has a beard too.

Makes you wonder where it starts or how it starts. I don't know if I should be surprised that children would make such statements, or maybe it is to be expected. Perhaps the pros need to grow up.

*Author's note: The children were reprimanded for cursing or unsportsmanlike conduct.