Everyone falls prey to the stresses and pains of everyday life. Even the simplest of situations can spawn into a bog of trouble and despair. What really adds to this fact is when we inevitably say, "Woe is me; nobody understands me; what did I do to deserve this; why am I being treated this way?" I think the id demands that we soothe ourselves by casting the shadow of blame for our dilemna wholly upon someone else. When more than one person attempts to do this in a certain situation it goes without saying that stress is inevitable. I had a variety of things stressing me yesterday before I went to my RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults) class. It felt good to get my mind off of things and talk about the methods and intentions of Christ while he was here on earth. While we did not address any of the issues that were gnawing at the pit of my stomach I somehow felt relieved. I am not sure why, but whether or not I am able to solve all of the problems that bother me, or whether they will remain I know that I am strong in one area that matters. Peripheral matters can't sway me away from the "big picture". I suppose that the best thing that I can do is to just keep living life the way that I am living it now, and not let myself fall into the habit of being ready to jump into a defensive posture. When you are on the defense you keep everything away and sometimes allow the precious gifts to slip through your grasp.
Being an Officer...a Black one.....is sometimes hard. [Howard Rollins from "A Soldier's Story"] Sometimes being an Officer is difficult....not because of hard tasks, short timelines, or all of the worries involved in the care of your Soldier's, but the aura of professionalism and objectivity that you must display at all times. There have been many times that I have wanted to make a comment, yell, cuss at someone, or otherwise let my personal feelings be known about a subject, but unfortunately I could not because of my position. Let me tell you about two incidents that bothered me in particular. I was in Dallas Ft. Worth airport waiting to catch a flight on the last leg of my TDY trip to help a returning unit at Ft. Sill. As I went to my gate, I saw 4 Sailors in their black uniforms gathered at the gate...one was large and white, the other three were black. There was very little room, and many of them were standing intermingled with civilian airline passengers...
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